I've become odd, I think. I wonder why I've bothered to start a blog when I post so infrequently. I wonder why I knit when I take so long to finish things, if I even finish them, for that matter. I wonder why on earth I want to make my own yarn when there is tons of perfectly good yarn out there in the world, waiting for me to do something with it. I don't know the answers to anything; I only know I like the way it makes me feel to spin and to knit. I relax. I turn from a stressed out nut who feels like I'm on the edge to a mellow woman who even lets her picture be taken and published to the web.
I hate that I've gained so much weight, but I know that some of it is out of my control. I was on an antidepressant for a couple of years that changes your metabolism enough that it makes it difficult to lose weight and easy to gain it. Fun, huh? So one of the things that made me depressed was the fact that I was fat and the drugs I was taking to make me not depressed helped to make me fat(ter). Catch 22, I think they call that. Anyway, I'm off those drugs now. I think I can control my own mind for now and I'm stressed but I'm happy, I think. It's ok to be stressed as long as it isn't so much that it makes it difficult to deal with normal life. I can leave it behind at work and relax at home. I can't always make my life happy, but it's nothing I can't deal with. Does that even make sense? I'm just typing random thoughts here tonight. I was on one of the lists I belong to and there were nearly 200 posts today! And every one of those posts was worth reading...how many times does that happen on Yahoo lists? In my experience, almost never, but it's like that here. Oh, it's not for everyone, I know, but the folks I've met there are so 'family' that it makes me happy to read and sad to read and interested to find out what everyone has to say.
Take a peek at my new Sonata! Yup, that's me over there, spinning on my new Kromski Sonata wheel. I actually let Mike take a picture of me and put it up here. I think that's a step in the right direction for me. There was a time I wouldn't have dared put a picture like that up. I'd be embarrassed; but I'm me. That's who I am and what I look like. I don't now and never will look like Marilyn Monroe and I would't be me if I did, right? So...take me or leave me, here's what I am and who I am.
See; I told you I was changing up... :o)
Remember, wear natural fibers; hug your cats!